Thursday, March 31, 2016

My Life Got Flipped-Turned Upside Down

So I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there, and I tell ya all about...

No, I did not become the Prince of Bel-Air.

I don't talk about work much and for a reason. So many people just go venting about work not thinking about the fact that people from work can see what they post. I am not one of those people, however, right now my job is a stressful area.

Without going into detail, my co-worker left in April 2012, my boss retired in June, and ever since there has been nothing but turnover. My third boss since fall 2012 is starting soon, and we are on our second replacement for my co-worker.

Of course, on top of this turmoil, I have been in grad school, and now and trying to get a visa for my fiance. You could say I've had stress overload.

I've been struggling with some depression and anxiety for quite a while now, and it was really bad the week before spring break. Things were finally starting to look up the first day of break. I took it easy, relaxed a little, and then I was going to form a plan to get some shit done!

Then, on Tuesday, my co-worker and work bff told me that she had accepted another job.

How do you be happy for someone and at the same time not let on that you are blindsided and devastated?

It's really hard.

I knew that she had applied, but she kept saying she didn't really want the job, and I never expected her to leave so quickly.

So, for the rest of the afternoon I just sat on the couch--my body felt as if it weighed two tons. My arms were like lead, my stomach churned, and I repeatedly wept. Was I happy for her? Yes! It is a great opportunity for her, but all that I could see is that I was going to be stuck in a place by myself for weeks, with no boss and no co-worker. Again...

Everyday this week I have been slower and slower in getting to work as if I could somehow stop time in doing so. These last two weeks have been pretty normal because I've been able to keep putting those thoughts out of my mind, but tomorrow is the last day.

Tomorrow is the calm before the storm.

I will endeavor to keep my cool and not let things get to me, but c'mon...this is me we're talking about.

Is long-suffering a quality employers desire??

Here's to you friend! Best of luck in your new endeavors!

But I still hate you for leaving...

Kidding! I love you...

But I'm still mad...

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